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        人生苦短 何必死要面子活受罪!

        添加时间:2016-09-30 16:32 来源:Binzz网[整理] 编辑:冷蝴蝶
        不知道这世上有多少人在为了所谓的面子而活着,为了面子,我们打肿脸充胖子,外面倒是风光好看了,但是难受的是自己!有一些面子还是放下吧!人生苦短,真没有必要让自己活得那么累!

          面子


               一个不错的姑娘,爱上了个不错的小伙子,有了一份不错的感情。

          但是,这感情遭到了姑娘的父母极力反对。

          因为小伙子十几岁时出了场车祸,导致左腿不太灵光,走路有点瘸。

          “我好好的一个女儿,凭什么嫁个瘸子?”他们说。

          姑娘说:他能跑能跳能开车能打球,他聪明懂事乐观能干,他对我有多好你们也都看到了。腿上这点毛病,除了不太好看,别的还有什么?我都能接受,你们还较什么劲?

          她父母说:说心里话,我们也能接受,但别人会怎么看?让人家都知道我女婿是个瘸子,我们的面子往哪儿搁?

          双方大战了八百回合,姑娘要离家出走,老妈要拿刀割腕,老爸要断绝父女关系。

          最后,姑娘妥协,跟小伙子分手。之后四年没再恋爱。

          到三十岁,姑娘好不容易又有了男朋友,到谈婚论嫁时,姑娘的父母提出要十二万彩礼。

          男方家境一般,只肯给三万。

          姑娘的妈说,你十二万给我,我马上退你十万,这样说出去,两家都有面子,你要是上来就给三万,亲戚朋友问起来,我怎么说?我女儿嫁不出去,大甩卖了吗?

          男方说,我们本来为了全款买婚房,就借了钱,现在要为了彩礼再借,借不到。

          然后婚事就崩了。

          姑娘现在三十五了,还单着。

          她父母出门,总有熟人问“你闺女找了吗?”这让他们恼恨不已,又无可奈何,回家就骂女儿,说“我们的老脸都让你丢光了。”

          姑娘的心情,可想而知。

          02

          还有个更悲伤的故事。

          一个外企的姑娘,嫁给了美国上司,风风光光移民纽约,全家人都觉得好有面子,连小学同学都多了炫耀的资本:我一个同学,移民纽约了,昨天还给我打越洋长途……

          可是在美国,她过的什么日子呢?

          老公长期出差,她孤身一人,没朋友,没工作,没人说话,没有归属感。用她自己的话说:活像一条孤寡的流浪狗。

          后来好不容易有了孩子,爱情却没了——她老公爱上了一个意大利姑娘,要跟她离婚。

          她死不肯。因为离开这个老公,她在美国根本活不下去,只能回国。

          但是,当年在众人艳羡的目光中光灿灿出来,如今却要一事无成带着孩子灰溜溜回去,这反差太大,她无法接受。

          于是就苦撑着。老公几乎不回家,她手忙脚乱地一边带孩子,一边给人刷盘子。

          也知道若能放下脸面回国,状况会好很多,但她思来想去,就是觉得没脸回来。

          03

          不得不说,中国人对面子的追求,已经到了令人发指的地步。

          小到请客吃饭,大到婚姻事业,“脸面”都是重大衡量因素。

          如果说为了面子,吹个小牛、撒个小谎、打个小架、买点奢侈品,尚且无伤大雅,可以理解。

          但涉及到人生大事,依然把面子摆在首位,宁可放弃实质幸福,也要保全面子,这实在是傻透气了。

          为了面子,割肾买iphone。

          为了面子,喝酒喝吐血。

          为了面子,放弃真爱,嫁了根本不合适的人。

          为了面子,守着残败不堪的婚姻,宁死不离婚。

          为了面子,面临再好的机会,也不敢去创业。

          为了面子,明知有错却死不悔改,硬着头皮死撑,使轻微小错变成大错特错。

          为了面子活,为了面子死,为了面子毁一生。

          想想真是好可怕。

          04

          我们要面子,有时候是因为怕。怕人笑话,怕人看不起,怕人指指点点。

          有时候是因为渴望。渴望被人艳羡,渴望得到尊重,渴望别人知道“我很牛”。

          人要脸,很正常。但这事儿实在应该适可而止。若是觉得面子大过天,人生恐怕就要悲剧。

          因为面子是给别人看的,而日子是自己感受的。你如果总是为了面子牺牲里子,打肿脸充胖子,最后多半就是落得一个死要面子活受罪。

          为了没必要虚荣,受一辈子罪。这不是最愚蠢可笑的行为吗?

          而且死撑出来的面子,最后往往反而让你没面子。

          面子,是人心里的一个大包袱,你越在意,它越沉重,你越会受制于它。

          而当你学会辨别和放下不必要的面子,你的生活,定会从容顺畅很多。

          所以,如果你已经因为面子问题苦恼不堪,觉得快要撑不下去,不如默念一句“爱谁谁”,然后痛痛快快就地放下。

          或者,如果你想做一件显然对自己有益的事,却因为忌惮别人的目光而犹豫挣扎,那么,请昂首挺胸对自己说一句:管它呢,老子的人生,是活给自己看的。

          [阅读过本文的朋友还对下面心态调整文章感兴趣]
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